ADVERTISEMENT

• (816): View more from Missouri

  Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.

  Fav 37 1235 4296

  share tweet
  

• (510): View more from California

  stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work

  Fav 20 7676 1929

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (251): View more from Alabama

  As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.

  Fav 33 10888 1748

  share tweet
  

• (419): View more from Ohio

  I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game

  Fav 5 3898 1248

  share tweet
  

• (518): View more from New York

  I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.

  Fav 5 4977 1323

  share tweet
  

• (270): View more from Kentucky

  they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.

  Fav 8 4643 1261

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (480): View more from Arizona

  im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk

  Fav 6 5452 1065

  share tweet
  

• (201): View more from New Jersey

  He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"

  Fav 4 4491 1151

  share tweet
  

• (512): View more from Texas

  Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus

  Fav 5 2739 1065

  share tweet
  

• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.

  Fav 11 2582 1118

  share tweet
  

• (530): View more from California

  Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me

  Fav 0 1377 548

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them

  Fav 4 1029 648

  share tweet
  

• (734): View more from Michigan

  Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?

  Fav 6 1066 590

  share tweet
  

• (504): View more from Louisiana

  He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.

  Fav 1 588 388

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.

  Fav 0 15 51

  share tweet
  

Randomize