Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
please come you make the beer taste better
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
