Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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