i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
