for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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