is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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