THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
