You're completely useless in the revolution.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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