this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
