dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
