nut hugger
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
