um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
