Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize