hotel room ftw
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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