She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize