summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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