not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
