12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
