How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
