sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
