I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
