If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Let's get the cat blown out
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
