I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Sorry about my life...
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
