She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
