just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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