its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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