im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
