There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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