if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
