I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Randomize
