Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
We are two peas in an std pod
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
