My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Randomize
