remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
