in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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