his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
