it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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