They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
