when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
