I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
