u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
