I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
no you cant smoke seaweed
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
