I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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