I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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