don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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