we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
