Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
barbara walters just said penis...
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
