wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Randomize