Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
