I think im going to throw up on grandma
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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