I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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