You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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